Beyond Religion: Are You Truly Ready For Marriage A Letter To The Bachelors Of This Generation By Mutohhir Olanrewaju Abdulhamid

In this 21st century, many Gen-Z youths are no longer thinking seriously about marriage. Some understand the reality and responsibilities that come with it, and that is why they are running away from it. Others truly desire marriage, but the harsh Nigerian economy keeps discouraging them.

One thing we must understand is this: marriage is not all about sex. It goes far beyond physical attraction and romantic feelings. Marriage is a lifelong journey filled with sacrifice, patience, responsibility, understanding, and emotional maturity.

If you truly desire to raise children and build a peaceful home, then you must sit down with yourself and ask honestly:

“Am I truly ready for this journey?”

What I have realized is that preparation for marriage is a gradual process. It does not start on the wedding day. It begins from the stage of self-development and responsibility.

Graduating from school — whether from a College, Polytechnic, or University — is important. Learning a skill or attending a modern Arabic school is also valuable. These are the first steps toward building stability in life.

After that comes another important responsibility: having a place you can call your own. Even if you decide to stay temporarily with your wealthy parents, you must still have a vision for independence and leadership.

Sadly, technology and social media have greatly influenced this generation. Many people now chase luxury lifestyles without preparing themselves mentally and emotionally for family life.

I personally enjoy watching movies, not just for entertainment, but to learn both the positive and negative lessons hidden in them. One thing I discovered is that the best training for society begins at home. Before trying to fit into society, one must first learn how to build and manage a healthy home.

From my observation, many young men today are not truly preparing for marriage. They are preparing for money, enjoyment, expensive lifestyles, and temporary relationships with women.

There is nothing wrong with making money or enjoying a good life when it comes in a lawful and responsible way. But as a man who dreams of becoming a husband and a father, you must have a stable source of income — something that can feed both you and your future family.

Marriage is not a joke.

Making money is good, but being responsible with money is even more important. Some young men are already supporting their parents financially, and such men may likely find it easier to care for their wives and children in the future because responsibility has already shaped them.

Now let us assume that deep down in your heart, you are truly ready to marry.

The next challenge is compatibility.

Thousands of people struggle to find someone whose mindset, values, dreams, and personality align with theirs. Love alone is not enough to sustain a home when understanding is absent.

And that is where many stories begin to change.

In the next episode, we will deeply discuss: